What type of communication style is usually appropriate for evaluation or counseling interviews with employees a casual B formal C Routine D technical?

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Most people acknowledge that networking—creating a fabric of personal contacts to provide support, feedback, insight, and resources—is an essential activity for an ambitious manager. Indeed, it’s a requirement even for those focused simply on doing their current jobs well. For some, this is a distasteful reality. Working through networks, they believe, means relying on “who you know” rather than “what you know”—a hypocritical, possibly unethical, way to get things done. But even people who understand that networking is a legitimate and necessary part of their jobs can be discouraged by the payoff—because they are doing it in too limited a fashion.

On the basis of a close study of 30 emerging leaders, the authors outline three distinct forms of networking. Operational networking is geared toward doing one’s assigned tasks more effectively. It involves cultivating stronger relationships with colleagues whose membership in the network is clear; their roles define them as stakeholders. Personal networking engages kindred spirits from outside an organization in an individual’s efforts to learn and find opportunities for personal advancement. Strategic networking puts the tools of networking in the service of business goals. At this level, a manager creates the kind of network that will help uncover and capitalize on new opportunities for the company. The ability to move to this level of networking turns out to be a key test of leadership.

Companies often recognize that networks are valuable, and they create explicit programs to support them. But typically these programs facilitate only operational networking. Likewise, industry associations provide formal contexts for personal networking. The unfortunate effect is to give managers the impression that they know how to network and are doing so sufficiently. A sidebar notes the implication for companies’ leadership development initiatives: that teaching strategic networking skills will serve their aspiring leaders and their business goals well.

When Henrik Balmer became the production manager and a board member of a newly bought-out cosmetics firm, improving his network was the last thing on his mind. The main problem he faced was time: Where would he find the hours to guide his team through a major upgrade of the production process and then think about strategic issues like expanding the business? The only way he could carve out time and still get home to his family at a decent hour was to lock himself—literally—in his office. Meanwhile, there were day-to-day issues to resolve, like a recurring conflict with his sales director over custom orders that compromised production efficiency. Networking, which Henrik defined as the unpleasant task of trading favors with strangers, was a luxury he could not afford. But when a new acquisition was presented at a board meeting without his input, he abruptly realized he was out of the loop—not just inside the company, but outside, too—at a moment when his future in the company was at stake.

A version of this article appeared in the January 2007 issue of Harvard Business Review.

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It’s probably safe to say you’ve left at least one meeting, call, or customer visit and thought to yourself, “What the heck was that person even talking about?”

Clear and effective communication is one of the easiest ways to reduce workplace stress, boost productivity, and build better relationships with your coworkers. But dealing with communication styles different than your own can sometimes feel like trying to get across to an alien species.

As Aubrey Blanche, global head of diversity and belonging at Atlassian writes:

“The differences between communication styles often cause more agony than they really need to.”

We all benefit from working with diverse people with different opinions. But to take advantage of everything they have to offer, we have to start speaking the same language.

Let’s take a look at some of the easiest ways to understand different communication styles at work, and how you can make sure you’re being heard, no matter who you’re talking to.

What’s up with all these different communication styles?

Despite studies saying we spend up to 80% of our workday in meetings, on the phone, and responding to emails, communication in the workplace isn’t always easy. Or enjoyable.

In fact, a 2016 Harvard Business Review article found that 69% of managers say they’re uncomfortable communicating with employees. (And you can only imagine that number is significantly higher when the roles are reversed!)

The majority of the pain of workplace encounters comes down to dealing with (and decoding) different communication styles. Dealing with people who speak differently than you is straight-up stressful. Not only does it waste time with all the clarifying back-and-forths, but it often leaves us feeling upset, angry, and overwhelmed.

So how do we try and sort through the mess of workplace communication?

While everyone communicates differently, most of us fall into a few different buckets when it comes to our preferred communication style. But even understanding those styles is a challenge in itself!

Do a basic Google search of communication styles and you’re bound to come up with a few takes. There are the classics: assertive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, and passive. Then you have a more linguistic approach, which places competitive against affiliative communicators and direct versus indirect. Finally, there’s even something called DISC (which stands for Dominant, Influencer, Steady, and Conscientious).

The problem with all these approaches, however, is that it’s easier to see their qualities in ourselves than in others. Even worse, they don’t tell us much about how we should communicate with them. Especially if we’re a completely different style ourselves.

One better approach I like to use is the communication styles defined by best-selling author and leadership coach Mark Murphy: Analytical, Intuitive, Functional, and Personal.

Murphy’s approach focuses on the key information each style is looking for in a conversation and how you can best communicate with them.

As he explains, “No one communication style is inherently better than another. But picking the wrong style for a particular audience, whether it’s one person or a thousand, shuts down listening and can spell trouble. Learning to build flexibility around your preferred style allows others to more successfully hear the important things you need to communicate.”

Let’s take a look at the qualities of each one of Murphy’s communication styles; what they’re good and bad for; and how to effectively communicate with someone who has a communication style different from you.

Analytical: Lovers of hard data and clearly defined tasks

As an analytical communicator, you love hard data, numbers, and specific language. As such, you’re usually wary of people who deal in vague language and strictly blue-sky ideas and get drained quickly when conversations move from logical to emotional.

One example Murphy gives is of being in a meeting and hearing that “sales are positive.” According to him, an analytical communicator would likely think, “What does positive mean? 5.2% or 8.9%? Give me a number!”

One clear advantage of being analytical is that communication is largely logical and unemotional, which can speed things up. However, the flip side is that you might come across as cold and aggravated when someone wants to talk about anything beyond just getting from A to B.

How to work with an analytical communication style

Try to:

  • Provide as much detail upfront as possible
  • Set clear expectations
  • Give them space to work independently

Avoid:

  • Turning the conversation emotional (i.e., use “I know” or “I think” rather than “I feel”)
  • Framing feedback on their work (especially data-heavy work) as criticism

Intuitive: The big-picture thinkers

Intuitive communicators are on the opposite end of the spectrum from analytical ones.

Instead of data, details, and concrete steps, the intuitive communication style thrives on big-picture ideas. Linear order, step-by-step instructions, and deep dives into the details aren’t important. Instead, they’re more interested in broad overviews that allow them to skip directly to what’s most important.

This can be great if you’re having a conversation that needs a quick answer. Or if you’re looking for out-of-the-box approaches to issues. However, when nuance and subtlety matter, it can feel like trying to fix a Swiss watch with a hammer.

How to work with an intuitive communication style

Try to:

  • Stick to the main topic and keep it high-level
  • Be prepared to answer follow-up questions
  • Keep details to a minimum (you can always follow up with these in an email after the conversation so they can reference back later on)

Avoid:

  • Too many details (obviously)
  • Taking their approach personally (they’re just doing what feels right to them)
  • Making too big promises (they’ll latch onto the big picture and ignore the details of how hard it might be to pull off)

Functional: Dealing with everything one step at a time

As someone with a functional communication style, you love the process.

But maybe more than that, you love step-by-step guides, details, timelines, and thought-through plans. When you’re talking to someone else, you want to go through each detail from start to finish to make sure nothing gets missed or glossed over.

Obviously, in the workplace, a functional communication style can be a huge benefit. For project managers or leaders, knowing all necessary steps puts you in a position to guide and lead. However, it can also make you a bit of a bore. Nothing makes an audience doze off like constantly digging into details and dealing with every project like it’s a grocery list.

How to work with a functional communication style:

Try to:

  • Practice “active listening” by repeating what they’ve said and asking follow-up questions
  • Expect them to ask for details, even if you’re just brainstorming

Avoid:

  • Rushing them to get to the end or make a decision
  • Assume they support an idea 100% (their criticism or feedback will often be on the steps, not the overall strategy)

Personal: Relationships over information exchange

Finally, there’s the personal communicator. You value connection, relationships, and emotional language above all. When you dig into something you care as much (or more) about the person saying it as what they’re saying. You’re a good listener. Great diplomat. And often can help smooth over issues that more hard-lined communication styles cause.

You’re often seen as the “glue” that holds a team together. You build strong relationships and see communication as a chance to get to know people rather than just move a project forward.

Unfortunately, this doesn’t go over well with everyone. Other communication styles (like analytical) become defensive or frustrated when a conversation turns into “feels.”

How to work with a personal communication style

Try to:

  • Keep conversations light and casual
  • Not get offended if they ask how something made you “feel” or make a strictly work conversation personal
  • Follow up with important details and information by email after the meeting (they probably won’t focus on it too much during your initial conversation)

Avoid:

  • Talking down to them or being overly pessimistic (they pick up on “vibes” more than others)
  • Try to contain the conversation to just stats and facts
  • Pressure them to do a deep dive into the details with you

Communication is taking over the workplace. Understanding communication styles help you get heard

We’ve written before about just how much communication is taking over the workplace. Knowledge workers, on average, check email or IM every six minutes, while most people barely have 1 hour and 12 minutes a day of focused, productive time without being distracted by communication tools.

(And that doesn’t even bring in-person meetings and phone calls into the picture.)

More and more, success comes down to our ability to communicate in a way that’s clear, concise, and understood by everyone.

This isn’t easy. But by understanding our own communication style and those of the people around us, we get invaluable clarity into how to be heard (and how to hear what everyone else is saying).

The more you’re able to speak the same language, the easier everything becomes.

A version of this article originally appeared on RescueTime and is adapted with permission. 

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