Why do guys finish so fast

Every woman experiences this at some point. It’s inevitable, really. But when a guy comes too fast what does it mean?

Maybe you’re trying for solutions and new ways to help him last longer?

It’s something that every woman experiences…

You’re in bed, you’re having fun fooling around and you just can’t wait to get to the good stuff.

You’re ready to go but all of a sudden…it’s over before it even really began.

While it’s a bit inconvenient and even annoying if it happens over and over again, there is a reason guys come too fast sometimes.

You really want to understand what’s going on before making any assumptions and giving up on him for good.

There are so many reasons a guy might be blowing his load a little earlier than you’d like. Here’s what may be causing him to get overly excited way too early.

1. It’s been a while

The longer a guy goes without coming, the less time it’ll take him to get there.

He’s not practiced. He hasn’t really had much of an opportunity to work on his stamina and for that reason, he might just not have any endurance in this department.

If this is the case, he may have already hinted that he hasn’t been intimate with someone in a while.

It’s not a huge deal since the more active he is in the bedroom, the better it’ll get.

2. He’s really attracted to you

Some guys just can’t hold in how excited you make them. It’s like, you’re just irresistible to them and they can’t stop themselves.

Always take premature ejaculation as a compliment, never ever shame him or feel bad for it!
It just means he’s super into you and thinks your absolutely gorgeous.

This could be the case for a guy who comes too fast. Usually, however, this won’t last very long. The more you two are together, the more control he’ll have over himself.

This should really only be a problem the first couple times you get together. If it keeps happening, there might be a bigger problem at play.

3. He has a condition

Premature ejaculation is a condition some guys have. When a guy comes too fast what does it mean in relation to this fact?

They just can’t help the fact that they finish right away sometimes. In order to tell if this is the reason, your man can’t hold on until you even get started with the main event, pay attention for the first few times you get together.

If it keeps happening and you try to slow it down and take it easy, he might just have a condition that you’ll need extra help with.

Here are 3 simple positions to help him last longer in bed

4. You’re really good

You may be able to pat yourself on the back with this one.

The reason your man is busting right away could just be because you’re really good and it feels far too nice for him to hold it in.

Essentially, you make him lose control. He can’t help himself…
This isn’t really a bad thing but you might want to think about going slower and easing into things so he doesn’t finish right away.

You can feel great about yourself if this is why he’s finishing too fast.

He’ll probably just tell you if this is the case and it’ll be super obvious.

5. He’s selfish

Let’s be real here: not all men are going to care about whether or not you have a good time in bed.

That’s just the reality of sex and sleeping with someone who doesn’t really care for you on an emotional level. He might just not care enough to control himself.

In his mind, he’s just looking for a good time. He wants to get his jollies and be on his way.

You’ll be able to tell if this is the case almost right away because he won’t be very attentive to you.

The foreplay will be minimal if it exists at all, and he’ll move right on into something he prefers. If this happens, avoid sleeping with that guy again. You just won’t get much more out of him.

6. He’s nervous

Nerves can affect a guy in the bedroom a lot more than you’d think.

If he’s really nervous, it could cause him to lose a lot of control and that could push him over the edge a lot sooner than he’d like.

The signs for this one are pretty straight-forward.

He’ll act pretty nervous the whole time you’re together and when it comes to getting frisky, he’ll be a little uncoordinated. You may even catch him shaking or sweating more than he should be.

This isn’t really something to worry about. Once again, the more time you spend with him and the more you’re intimate together, the better he’ll get and he’ll be able to perform in a more pleasurable way.

7. ​He has very little self-control

A lot of a man’s stamina in the bedroom comes from self-control. He has to stop himself from finishing until you’re done. That’s really the basis of it.

Over time, guys learn how to control this so they can last longer and longer. Some men, however, just don’t have enough self-control to stop it from happening, no matter how long they’ve been trying to master it.

And some guys just don’t realize they can control it if they practice some. You can mention this to him but overall, just take it slower. Be sure to extend the foreplay, maybe even use some vibrating toys. If you have 3 orgasms before he’s even had one, it’s going to go a long way in making him (and you!) feel better.

Pull away when you think he’s going to finish so he can regain control and then start again. Over time, it’ll get better.

8.  He’s inexperienced

We all know the story of a guy losing his virginity after a whole 30 seconds with a girl. It happens.

Guys get really excited when they don’t have a lot of experience and they also lack the control and discipline needed to last a long time.

If this is the case, you’ll know it. He’ll either be very young or over-eager to get in bed with you.

9. He doesn’t know how to pace himself

There’s a reason people switch sex positions so many times and it’s not always just to keep things more interesting.

Some guys want to dive right in and go as hard and as fast as they can until they finish. The thing is, it takes women a lot longer to get there so this could be really inconvenient for you.

In order to fix this, stop him before he’s about to finish and switch positions.

That’ll give him some time to regain control so he can get back to work.

Men finishing too early is awkward, but sometimes it’s an inevitable issue you’ll have to deal with together. ​Start by talking about it, and don’t let your frustration show through.

PRO TIP:

One of the best things you can do to prolong pleasure for both of you is taking foreplay to the next level.
That way all the initial bubbling excitement will be more balanced and build up more naturally….

Become master of foreplay and dominate your man, check out the ultimate bible for dirty talking.

You’ll discover the hidden tips and secrets of what it takes to understand how your man thinks, and how to use this to your advantage.

When you know how to turn him on, he’ll be yours, forever.

So don’t wait around. Take control of your romance for good.

• Premature ejaculation is the most common sexual problem in men.
• Occasionally losing control is normal. Most men orgasm sooner than they would like from time to time. 
• There is a variety of treatments to choose from, including exercises, therapy and medications.

Premature ejaculation is the most common sexual problem for men. It is a lack of control over ejaculation so that it often happens sooner than the man or his partner wants, causing distress for one or both partners.

Some men ejaculate as soon as foreplay starts. Others lose control when they try to insert their penis, while some ejaculate very quickly after penetration. Whatever the case, premature ejaculation can cause distress and create tension between a man and his partner.

Some men will have premature ejaculation from the time of their first sexual experience (lifelong), while in others, it will develop after a period of normal sexual activity (acquired).

Occasionally losing control over ejaculation is normal. Premature ejaculation is only a problem if it happens frequently. Most men occasionally reach orgasm sooner than they'd like. For example, it is common for a man to ejaculate quickly the first time he has sex. It is also common if a man hasn't ejaculated for a long time. The occasional loss of control doesn't mean the man has a sexual problem.

Causes of premature ejaculation

In the past, premature ejaculation was thought to be entirely psychological. However, it is now thought that some men (particularly those with lifelong premature ejaculation) have a chemical imbalance in the brain centres controlling this function (this is called a neurobiological cause). This can, in turn, lead to associated psychological problems, such as performance anxiety.

Acquired premature ejaculation can be caused by psychological factors such as:

• depression or anxiety, particularly about performance
• feeling anxious about rejection by a sexual partner
• expecting failure
• negative sexual experiences in childhood
• religious beliefs
• stress
• problems within the relationship.

Some men develop acquired premature ejaculation because they have erectile dysfunction (are unable to get or keep an erection than enables them to have sex).

Treatment for premature ejaculation

Seeking help for premature ejaculation from a doctor or sex therapist is a good idea. Treatments for premature ejaculation will vary depending on the cause and whether it is lifelong or acquired premature ejaculation. The treatments include:

• behavioural techniques – these include the Semans 'stop-start' technique and the Masters and Johnson 'squeeze' technique
  • the Semans technique involves learning to control the sensations prior to ejaculation. The idea is to repeatedly bring yourself close to ejaculation, then stop and rest. If you do this often enough, you will learn to recognise your 'point of no return'
  • the Masters and Johnson technique (named after the famed sex researchers) involves squeezing the end of the penis just before ejaculation to lessen the urge to ejaculate.These exercises can be done alone or with a partner

• Kegel exercises – these exercises are designed to strengthen the pelvic floor. To identify the muscles of your pelvic floor, stop yourself from urinating in midstream. This is the action you need to practice when your bladder is empty. Tightly contract the muscles and hold for 10 seconds. Repeat 10 times, three times a day
• psychotherapy and counselling – with the guidance of an experienced sex therapist, any underlying anxieties about sex can be explored and eased
• reducing penile sensation – local anaesthetic sprays and creams can be used to reduce penile sensation and should be applied 30 minutes before sexual intercourse. Use these treatments with a condom to prevent absorption by your partner. Using two condoms may also help to reduce sensation
• SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) and tricyclic antidepressants – a side effect of these medications is to slow ejaculation when used in men with depression. This effect may be helpful in men with premature ejaculation, and these medicines can be used in conjunction with counselling. Taking SSRIs can have other side effects such as decreased libido (sex drive), nausea, sweating, bowel disturbance and fatigue. Only one SSRI (dapoxetine) has been approved as a treatment for premature ejaculation and it is taken as required before sexual intercourse
• if the premature ejaculation is associated with erectile dysfunction, erectile dysfunction treatments such as PDE5 inhibitors (Viagra©, Cialis©, Levitra©) can help restore control of ejaculation.

Where to get help

• Your doctor (GP)
• Sex therapist

• Premature ejaculation , 2018, Healthymale (Andrology Australia).

This page has been produced in consultation with and approved by:

This page has been produced in consultation with and approved by:

This page has been produced in consultation with and approved by:

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