I won’t say that it’s easy to stop comparing yourself to others. For most of us, comparing ourselves with others is part of us. When we were little, our parents compared us to our siblings, we were in competitions where it was all about ranking top three, we wanted that sports trophy, and we were made well aware of the competition when applying for colleges. But there comes a point in life when comparing yourself to others does not serve you anymore. If you’re going to do your best work and unleash your unique gifts in this life, you simply can’t be concerned with how you are compared to others. That’s their path. They have nothing to do with you. Here are few ways by which life becomes so much more enjoyable when you stop comparing yourself to others. 1. You actually begin to appreciate the progress that you make, rather than just telling yourself how much less progress you’re making than somebody else. You allow yourself to celebrate victories — big and small and celebrating those gives you the much-needed energy to keep moving forward. 2. Meanwhile, failures don’t hurt as much. You can look at them for exactly what they are — no less but also no more. Before, you made a huge deal out of small failures because you just kept thinking about how much further that put you behind somebody else. 3. When you compare yourself to somebody else, you don’t really focus on your work. All you think about is how quick you are, or aren’t, seeing results compared to the other person. It’s distracting and can lead to poor quality work. 4. There are probably a lot of people out there who would look up to you if you composed yourself as someone who believes in herself and is proud of his/her accomplishments. The second you stop comparing yourself to others, you’ll be surprised to find that you inspire a lot of people. 5. You really cannot be your true self — bring your unique talents and do what just you are meant to do. Comparing yourself to others has a way of clouding who you really are, and what your skills are. 6. When we compare ourselves with others, we often aim to pretend we are something that we aren’t. We want people to think we’re better than we are, so we certainly cannot ask for help because that would be to admit that we aren’t what we pretend to be. Once you stop comparing yourself to others, you can actually ask those who are ahead of you for some advice. 7. Once you free your mind of thoughts of comparison, you can get those creative juices flowing. We are our most creative when we aren’t worrying about something.
They say that comparison is the thief of all joy, and there’s no question that the hours we spend measuring our own life against that of others is time that would be better spent being grateful for what we do have, or even working to achieve the goals we’ve set for ourselves. Of course, some level of comparison is inevitable, especially in this age of social media when we can observe the dream vacations, seemingly perfect relationships and otherwise fabulous lives of others with a quick scroll through our Instagram feed. I’m as guilty as anyone — no matter how much I want to always be happy when great things happen to others, it can be tough not to weigh our lives against theirs. So what can we do to counteract the comparison game? I think it helps to start each day with gratitude, choose to be present in our everyday lives, limit our social media consumption if necessary, and remind ourselves that we are enough just as we are. Click through the slides for a few of my favorite quotes that help me do each of these, and say goodbye to negative comparisons for good. featured image via the coveteur A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it, it just blooms. – Zen Shin “Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions … do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.” Tina Fey
Author Camille Styles |