Today I kissed my friend because she wanted "practice" for her boyfriend. It was very unenjoyable to me - just simply the feeling of lips against lips, going through the motions for the sake it. It was boring and didn't feel good or intimate in the slightest. I have a huge crush on someone and constantly fantasize about kissing them and was hoping this experience would replicate that, but it just felt very dull. No spark. Now I'm super anxious that EVERY kiss is going to be like that, even with someone I genuinely have feelings and compassion for... But that can't be! Can someone please reassure me and share their experiences on kissing someone romantically and what that felt like? Show
I love writing about relationships, love, romance, and flirting. I hope you find the advice in my articles useful. Annette Sousa What Does a First Kiss Feel Like?First kisses are often magical. This is a moment when emotions run wild, the eye contact between two people communicates desire, and the intimate experience about to unfold is one full of feeling, as if time is standing still in the moment . . . or not! All first kisses are different. They can be romantic, silly, sweet, goofy, you name it. If you are in a long-term relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend, maybe the time has come for your first kiss! You may be wondering:
We will talk about it all. After reading this article, you will know all about the first-kiss experience and what to expect when you kiss for the first time. We will talk about kissing styles, the types or kinds of kisses, and how to relax enough to enjoy such a passionate, special moment! Kissing Feels Like . . . A first kiss feels like you are frozen in a moment in time. It's as if you can feel and hear the other person's heart beating. It's a bridge of energy being shared between two people. David Calderón 1. The First Kiss Could Be Totally SpontaneousYou may have been planning for the picture-perfect moment when you kiss your boyfriend or girlfriend for the first time at a certain place and time. However, chances are that it may not happen exactly the way you expected it to or thought it would. Your first kiss could happen at your place, in a backyard, at a party, on the bus, at his place when his parents are not around, on a chilly winter date, at a friend's place, or at the most random of places. It could be as spontaneous as a lightning strike, so don't expect the precious moment to happen exactly at the time you want it to. 2. You Will Feel Nervous When You Kiss for the First TimeRegardless of how much you have thought out your first kiss over and over again in your head, it may be that you will still feel nervous when you lock lips for the first time. If you really have deep feelings for the guy or girl who shares your first kiss, your mind is likely to go blank. Along with butterflies in your stomach, you may experience a pang of nervousness just before you lean into your boyfriend, girlfriend, or crush. 3. Your Girlfriend or Boyfriend May Not Reciprocate InstantlyIf you take charge and decide to make the first move, your guy or girl may be taken aback and dazed. If this happens, they may not reciprocate instantly. Don't look at this as a sign of rejection—it's natural for first-time kissers to hesitate. Sense the situation, and if you think that your boyfriend or girlfriend has been left stunned out of surprise, just plant a tender kiss and go with the flow. Continue leaning in towards your partner. Unless either the guy or the girl has kissed before and knows how to take charge, both could amusingly tilt their heads the same way and fumble up the kiss in the beginning. This comic fumble is cute and the both of you are likely to giggle it off as you proceed to kiss each other for the first time. Randy Colas Don't feel bad if you bump noses with the guy or girl you lean in to kiss for the first time. It could be possible that either one of you comes in too fast or too slow, leading to a romantic nose bump or a funny forehead or face bump with each other. Nose bumps can happen when both partners tilt their heads the same way. A forehead bump could be in the cards if both the guy and the girl approach each other with downward-looking faces. Either way, treat it as something funny that just made your first kiss even more playful.
6. Expect Your First-Kiss Experience to be Soft and TenderFirst kisses are generally not as intense as the ones partners usually share as their relationship progresses inside the bedroom. Expect your first kiss to be tender and soft. Both of you are likely to be in exploring mode—that leaves little room for a bumpy ride. If this is your first kiss, it is totally normal to kiss with your mouth closed and give a peck. 'French kissing' with an open mouth is generally reserved for more experienced kissers—for men or women in long-term relationships. So, take the pressure off your first time and enjoy the passionate moment without the high expectations on performance. 7. Don't Expect Lip Biting When You Kiss for the First TimeKissing for the first time is a discovery for both the guy and the girl. Unless your partner is an expert kisser, both of you are likely to stay away from any kind of lip biting or nibbling. Don't be afraid and don't speculate about whether it will hurt if he/she bites, because the chances of that happening are slim. Not to mention, biting is another way of referring to a gentle nibble when kissing . . . 8. Your First Kiss Could Be Over Very QuicklyUnless there is tongue action, which is unlikely, your first kiss could be over quicker than you expected it to be. But even if it lasts only a couple of seconds, it will be etched in your memory as the longest most passionate few seconds ever. Slow-motion, romantic kissing scenes in the movies seem to last for eternity, but in real life, a short but tender lip-lock could be all you get for the first time. Don't be disheartened, and if you think that your first kiss was over too soon and went too fast, lean in for another go. Edward Cisneros 9. You Could Giggle and Laugh AfterwardsThe first-kiss experience is a jolting concoction of emotions, racing heartbeats, nervousness, fumbles, and happiness. The exciting moment may leave you giggling with a jolt of romantic happiness up your spine or butterflies in your stomach. 10. First Kisses Could Be Sloppy If There Is Tongue InvolvedGenerally, there is not much tongue action involved in the first kiss. But if your first kiss transforms into a romantic make-out session, expect the tongue to venture out, depending on your appetites for intimacy. Licking may be the natural thing to do after both of you have explored and felt a tender touch on the lips. This style of kissing is also often referred to as 'french kissing' or 'making out.' Unlike seasoned kissers, you and your guy/girl are likely to lick all over each other's lips, inside and out. And as tongues find their way deeper into each others' mouths, your first kiss will go from dry to sloppy to wet (yes, be prepared for saliva on the face!). Video: Practice Kissing Your HandHow to Initiate a KissWhereas every first kiss is different, understand what it takes to initiate a kiss so that it is a great first experience:
The Types of Kisses and Their Meaning
Does Every Culture Kiss?According to the article What’s in a Kiss? The Science of Smooching by the British Council, "Approximately 90% of cultures kiss, making a strong case for the act being a basic human instinct." Whereas the remaining 10% of people in various cultures engage in other intimate behaviors like rubbing noses or touching in other ways, kissing plays an important role in human behavior. We simply enjoy it! Oxytocin: Those 'After Kissing' FeelingsThe body has certain regions or arousal areas called erogenous zones, and the lips or mouth is one such location where our senses are heightened. That means our brain receives a chemical elixir of all sorts of good hormones, which includes dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin. Of these hormones, oxytocin, is known as the "love hormone" and helps us to develop feelings of security and attachment. Oxytocin is also a powerful anti-stress hormone. It literally lowers the stress hormone, cortisol, in the blood! Video: What Not to Do During a First KissRegardless of how many times you have practiced the moves you are going to pull off when you lean in to kiss your boyfriend or girlfriend for the first time, a first kiss seldom goes according to plan. As with any form of first-time intimacy, the magical moment will take its own turns. Don't drown yourself in a sea of expectations from the very moment you start thinking about kissing a guy or a girl for the first time. Your life is not a movie set. Feel free to share your first kiss with someone who you think is worth feeling happy and sad for. Forget the expectations, and embrace your kiss the way it turns out to be. |